The 5% solution

After the consistently, continuously crappy weather we had up until a couple of weeks ago, there was some noise on the media about overbreeding mosquitoes. And I have come up with a Most Satisfactory Answer.

Everybody should stay unspeakably drunk all the time. That way, any mosquitoes who bite people will die of alcohol poisoning before they have a chance to reproduce. If any do survive long enough to lay eggs, the larvae will be afflicted with Larval Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (LASD) and probably won't make it, since mosquitoes, lacking opposable thumbs, have never developed the technology necessary to support special-needs larvae. And if they do live, they won't be able to bite for themselves and will have to go on blood stamps.

I wouldn't be surprised if Obama or the UN is, even now, creating a new bureaucracy for this very purpose.

Death and taxes

Why, O why are we making such an overweening fuss about the HST, a perfectly sensible consumption tax, levied only on disposable income, and only at the point of disposal thereof? If you don't want to pay HST, stay away from the mall. Drive less. Buy second-hand. Grow food. Shouldn't we be doing all those things anyway?

And why, O why do we silently suck up an ever-increasing "carbon" tax, a cash cow based on fraud, junk science, and the irresistible inclination of government to take shameless advantage of the profound gullibility of a public softened up by alarmist propaganda? Since carbon is the basis of all life, those who think it's bad can eliminate their guilt by offing themselves. And the rest of us are now being TAXED FOR EXHALING. Welcome to BC. How long can you hold your breath?

"Stupid" bomb

One small carelessness or stupidity can touch off a chain reaction of untoward events, culminating in endless inconvenience and frustration. This is a trite statement, and easily dismissed, until you're actually at the frustration end of things. A small package, sent via Fedex, failed to appear at my door last week. After several emails back and forth, we discovered the shipper had incorrectly entered the address: 2149 instead of 2140. Perfectly understandable, since the two digits are side-by-side on the keyboard. However, the good folks at 2149 have denied all knowledge of said package and claim never to have received it. And the fallout: my homestay student is out several hundred dollars and doesn't have her tickets to the NBA game she was planning to see when she travels to New York on spring break.

All because somebody hit a wrong key and didn't bother to proofread.

Reminds me of an old chant in House-That-Jack-Built style:

For the want of a nail the shoe was lost,
For the want of a shoe the horse was lost,
...blah, blah, blah...the kingdom was lost,
And all for want of a horseshoe nail.

Sigh.